Bumps, Bruises, Barfs and Burgers-A Typical Night Out with the Family
On Sundays, the wife and I like to meet up with some good friends for ice cream. They have a sweet little girl who is my daughters BFF. This past Sunday, we decided to go out for dinner at Pawley’s Front Porch.
Pawley’s Front Porch is a wonderful hamburger joint and was featured on The Food Networks, “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives.” Pawly’s is located in the heart of Five Points, not too far from The University of South Carolina. (Go Cocks!) The plan was to meet up at 6pm, have some burgers and a couple of beers, and let the little ones run around and wreak havoc on a sleepy college eatery.
As anyone with kids knows, plans change faster than a fart rips through grandmas underpants.
Upon our arrival, myself, the wife, my two-year old daughter and seven month old son, were greeted and seated. I ordered a beer. (Little did I know that I was really going to need that beer. BTW the beer in question was a New Belgium 1554 Black Ale.) A few minutes later, Keri (the mother of our daughters BFF) appeared, declaring that they were going to have to go back home due to the projectile vomit proceeding out of their daughters mouth.
While we were conveying our condolences on the loss of a very nice shirt, my son (who was sitting in a high chair at the end of the table) thought it would be fun to slide out of said chair and dangle by his head. I always thought a Jack Rabbit in heat was fast, until I saw my wife spring into action and save my son from what would’ve become a bumped head and a bruised ego.
Then all settled down. For a minute. Our waitress came to take our order, and while my wife was placing hers, which consisted of a boring burger and fries, the boredom was alleviated when my wife noticed our son chewing on the paper menu that she had in her hands. The waitress, without missing a beat, asked, “Is that menu good?” My son, without missing the table, spewed the todays specialthrough the air. At that point, we were like, whatever. We then spent the next 15 minutes trying to fish the paper out of his mouth.
I am happy to say, we did get to finish placing our order and got to enjoy a wonderful meal of which I will now tell you about.
I had the Frip Island, a burger consisting of southern salsa, boursin cheese, and a couple of slices of fried green tomatoes, snuggled between a warm pretzel bun. Accompanying the Frip Island was Franks Red Hot Onion Rings.
To say the burger was good, would be as boring as watching my wife order food. The boursin cheese, as it melted with every bite I took, offered a sweetness to the tart of the fried green tomatoes. The pretzel bun was perfect for this type of burger. The inside of the bun was soft, and continued to soak up the juices and flavors of the burger, while the outside remained crisp. I never had to worry about the bun falling apart, dispensing its contents into my lap.
The only let down came from the onion rings, and it had nothing to do with the taste. The name of the rings was Frank’s Red Hot Onion Rings, but they were neither red, nor hot. I expected something with some spice, but this was as mild as a baby’s punch to the jaw. The taste was sweet, something I have never experienced with onion rings, and was very satisfying, I just wished they named it something else.
I washed everything down with R.J. Rockers Patriot Pale Ale. R.J Rockers is a brewery located in downtown Spartanburg, SC. The tart hoppiness was followed by a sweet caramel aftertaste. A great beer for a great burger!
Our night ended the way I had expected the whole outing to be in the first place, uneventful. While I thought our dinner at Pawlys Front Porch would be a typical evening out with the family, the adventure we encountered was a fun one. I will always remember the night we endured projectile vomit, falling kids, and edible menus while experiencing one of the best damn burgers I have ever had.
So, if you live in Columbia, or plan on visiting sometime soon, make sure you stop by Pawlys Front Porch. Oh, and bring the family and create a memory .
